What do I expect from myself? This is a question you must reflect on in order to process and move on from life’s challenges. You’re only going to get what you expect from any situation.
Heartache, job loss, illness, death; any of these can incarcerate your thoughts, making you feel burdened; ushering you into self-doubts and whys. However, it is in the healing steps, the vulnerable moments, that you find your strength. Here are simple steps that will help you move on in life.
12 Steps to Move on Peacefully for a Better Life
1.Breathe
Breathing is life and is going to be your best friend when learning how to move on.
When studying what causes emotions(1), psychologist and scientist insist you invoke joy by breathing slowly, deeply and through the nose; breathing regularly while relaxing your rib cage.
You do not have to join a yoga class — it is suggested, see step 10 — or cognitive therapy group in order to breath right; just use this highly underrated life necessity to guide you into the surrender; use slow, belly deep breaths to help combat anxieties.
2.Surrender
“Surrender is the simple but profound wisdom of yielding to rather than opposing the flow of life.” Eckhart Tolle, The Power Of Now(2)
At some point you have to accept controlling everything isn’t possible, self-control is. Manifesting positivity forces you past the darkest of situations and into serenity.
If you allow the circumstances five minutes ago to infest the present, you have not surrendered. Breathe! Surrendering to yourself is the torch lighting the path to move on. Surrendering allows calmness and unloads a bountiful flow of self-compassion.
3. Feel
You need to go through the emotions, allowing them to pass; holding onto them is dangerous.
- Denial
- Grief
- Anger
- Regret
- Sadness
These are just a few feels you can go through, don’t take them personally. They are real and part of moving on but do not define you. Allow yourself to accept feelings and in accepting, you become aware of how to relieve suffering.
4. Observing Emotions
Once you’re able to unload, you must observe.
1. Observe the cause of the emotions. You’ll start getting those “uh-huh” moments and you’ll be able to stop consuming-thoughts.
2. Observe the actual emotion. Take a deep breath and watch your newly surrendered self tap-out of the ring of negativity, allowing those feelings to wrestle there way out.
This step allows you to take each feeling and use what’s needed. Be mindful and inhale, dismissing what isn’t.
5. Forgive
Forgiveness isn’t for others, Indeed, it is for you. The Mayo Clinic (3) suggest that being unforgiving allows the past to affect future life stages, assisting depression and anxiety, which can keep you from creating new connections.
There is no guide on forgiving, you just have to do it; in between breaths. Forgiving isn’t weakness, it’s action.
6. Examine Life, Presently
“When I say “life”, I am talking about life, per se, not what you do. You generally think life is your family, your work, your business, your wealth, whatever else you possess but these are all accessories of life.”, explains Sadhguru (4).
Deeply examine the freedom of circumstance once you have forgiven or grieved (5), observed and surrendered.
What is left? You are left; the whole you!
Only pain left with the sadness: examine you, embrace you, love you, forgive you.
7. Create
“Learning to use all your emotions creatively is very important, “ Sadhguru says.
Now in motion, move on motivationally by creating the space you deserve. Start manifesting all those wants and wishes.
Opening up to your creativity can release hidden emotions. The subconscious likes to assist the ego in opening baggage when we start feeling good.
When used appropriately, creativity can really manifest some good stuff. Paint, draw, write, do pottery, or anything that has, or is, striking your passions. This can redirect your energy, aiding in peace.
8.Nurture
Just as we observed the negative, we must observe and nurture the positive; apply that you are learning how to move on.
Continuously remind yourself of the process you are going through. To nurture is to award progress.
9. Relax
Take some time to process the process; meditate or just breath. Allow yourself time to mend.
Enjoy the peace, sit back, and take in the successes of breaking through. You’ve moved on from the problem and into the relaxation of the mind.
10.Interact
Now, breathing normally, get out and enjoy life. Take a yoga class maybe, to center and keep your breath. Enjoy nature and the presence of others. Discuss it with others.
There are people out there that have gone through your situation before and want to listen. People appreciate progress in conflict. You may be what someone needs to get through their surrender.
11. Reflect
Reflect on who you were in the beginning compared to who you have become; a more centered, self-loving individual.
You used your oppression as progression. These little steps are sustainability for consistant subcontious assistance.
12. Release
Let go of it all and exhale! You are still here and stronger because of it.
So take those memories and keep them as ammunition against future struggles. You are free to lead a better life!
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