If you struggle to say no to people, you might feel like youâre losing your sanity sometimes. Saying no can be hard to do, but it is well worth it sometimes to save your well-being. However, finding kind ways to say no to people can help make the situation easier for both of you.
You can say no if a friend asks a favor or a co-worker wants to switch shifts. You can stand your ground while being kind, and then you wonât be left with guilt later on. Plus, when you say no this way, it prevents you from being guilted into doing something you donât want to do.
Helping others can be good, but only if youâve put yourself first. You donât have to say yes to everything asked of you, especially if youâre already too busy. Even if you arenât too busy, you still have every right to say no to something you donât want to do.
Use These Fifteen Phrases to Say No to People
You can use your best judgment to determine when youâre needed or not. Putting your well-being should come before helping others with things they could do themselves or ask someone else to do. Use these kind phrases to say no to people and keep your sanity.
1. This sounds like a great opportunity, but Iâll have to pass at this time.
Saying no in this way is beneficial because it starts with a compliment. If you want to elaborate, you could give specific examples about why it sounds like a great opportunity.
However, if you donât want to go into detail, you donât have to. You can decide what compliment to give and how much to share or use this phrase verbatim. The goal is, to begin with, a positive statement to make the other person feel good even when you say no.
2. Iâm super busy right now, but letâs plan for another time.
Don’t be afraid to establish boundaries if you are short on time. When someone asks you to do something that isnât time-sensitive, this is a thoughtful way to say no. Explain that you are busy, but make sure the other person knows you want to get together.
Let them know that you want to plan for another time. It might help if you set a date or time right then, or you can tell the person youâll reach out to make plans.
3. Thank you for thinking of me, but I canât this time.
Stay positive and thank the person for thinking of you, but make it clear that you canât do it this time. Even if you canât help, respect the fact that they asked as it shows they view you as responsible and trustworthy. Take their request as a compliment rather than feeling annoyed or obligated.
4. Iâd love to help, but my schedule is full right now.
Donât complicate the situation as you tell someone no. Let the person know youâd love to help if you could but are overloaded with tasks. Keep it short and sweet, but stick to the point.
If you give a long explanation, it opens you up to prodding and begging. Donât put yourself in that position by giving too much explanation. Be polite, but keep the conversation as short as possible.
5. I have an appointment that day, so Iâll have to pass.
If you have a valid reason that the other person canât try to talk you out of, it might help to explain. If you have a prescheduled appointment, it is the perfect excuse to say no, and most people wonât try to sway you. You donât have to explain what your appointment is for, allowing you to use it in whatever context you want.
6. I can see that you donât give up easily, but Iâm not changing my mind.
Some people will always try to change your mind when you say no. They might not want to accept your refusal, but you should still stick to your answer. By using this phrase, you keep it lighthearted and polite, but you reaffirm your answer.
If they keep needling, you might have to push back. Donât give in because then the other person will continue the behavior in the future. You arenât obligated to help, so donât give in if they keep asking.
7. Although I canât spend time with you right now, Iâd love to get together soon.
If you have to turn down a request for lunch or a get-together, this is a thoughtful way to refuse. Make sure the other person knows that youâd love to spend time together even if you canât this time. Itâs easier to say no when you follow it with a positive point, such as getting together soon.
8. I wish I could, but Iâm busy that day.
While itâs hard to say no to people, you can keep it simple and to the point. Your time is valuable, too, so you canât always say yes to everything. You arenât required to give away all of your energy and free time.
Remember that you donât always have to explain yourself. You can keep it short and avoid sharing details about your plans.
9. Iâm spending time with my family that day.
Not many people can argue with you about spending time with your family. They wonât want to interrupt or take away from your family time, so itâs a respectful and kind answer. You donât have to explain what youâll be doing with your family, so you can keep it simple.
10. I canât right now, but maybe I can help out later.
If youâre willing to help the person out at a later time, use this phrase. They might not need help later, but itâs still nice to offer a hand later on. Including the words âright nowâ gets the point across that youâd like to help but canât, so it keeps the refusal kind and polite.
11. Iâll think about it and get back to you.
While giving a definite answer is the best option, you might need more time sometimes. By asking for time to think about it, you give yourself a chance to build courage. With courage, you can get back to them a short time later and give them a straightforward and honest answer.
Plus, asking for more time gives you a chance to think about if itâs something you want to do. Either way, donât wait too long to answer because you donât want to seem rude. Take the time to think it through, build confidence, and then reach out with an answer as soon as possible.
12. Iâm busy, but if I get some free time, Iâll let you know.
This phase is assertive and polite, making it the perfect way to say no to people. Using firm and definitive words leave no room for negotiation, so the other person likely wonât try to sway you. By explaining that youâll let them know if you get the time, theyâll leave you alone and maybe move on to someone else.
13. I wish I could, but I have a lot going on right now.
Being straightforward rather than trying to make excuses can make the refusal easier for both of you. If you have a full schedule already, donât add more to it. Likewise, if you havenât had time for self-care, you should also turn down any other requests.
Take care of yourself first before considering helping others. Donât be afraid to say that you already have a lot going on. You shouldnât feel obligated to over-commit yourself or cause unnecessary stress in your life.
14. Sadly, I donât have the energy for anything else right now.
When you say no to people, you can use this phrase or add more. Remember that you can leave your refusal short and sweet, but donât be afraid to elaborate if youâre comfortable.
You can tell the other person if youâve worked a double shift or had a late night. These are things theyâll likely understand. However, if you arenât comfortable or would prefer not to share, donât worry about coming up with a reason for not having the energy.
15. Iâm not comfortable with that, but I can help with something else instead.
You might find yourself in a situation where youâre willing and able to help, but not with what youâre asked to do. Donât be afraid to say you arenât comfortable doing something and asking for a different task instead. If the person truly needs the help, theyâll quickly offer another suggestion.
Final Thoughts on Kind Ways to Say No to People and Keep Your Sanity
While many people have a hard time saying no, you are allowed to do it, and you donât have to feel bad for it. Finding kind ways to say no to people can help make the situation easier, saving you from tension or awkwardness. Setting boundaries and learning to set limits is a key to your sanity. Donât waste your time or energy doing things that detract from your overall well-being.
The next time you find yourself asked to do something, remember these kind ways to say no to people. Helping others and being there for them is gracious, but you donât have to say yes each time.