When youâre angry, you might say hurtful or life-destroying things. Even when you donât mean the words you say, you might hurt someone you care for. Words hurt, especially when they come from someone you love, so limit the negative comments you spew at your loved ones when youâre angry.
Once you say something, you canât take it back or make the other person un-hear it. You can apologize, but it doesnât make the pain any less, and it doesnât fix everything. The best thing you can do is avoid saying negative comments when youâre angry.
You might say things when youâre angry that kill the other personâs self-confidence. Even with an apology, you canât restore the confidence you caused them to lose. Plus, theyâll always wonder if there is some truth in what you said, even if you assure them otherwise.
Fourteen Negative Comments to Avoid Saying
Take some time to read these negative comments that you should never say in anger before you experience an angry situation again. Remember that apologies are hard to do, and they donât always fix things. Avoid saying negative comments, instead, and you wonât have to worry about forgiveness and regret.
1. I hate you. (The worst of all the negative comments)
This phrase is often spoken out of anger to people that you love. Since the people you say it to love and care about you typically, itâll cut deep when you speak these words. Saying that you hate someone is impossible to take back, and they might never forget when you said it.
2. I wish you were never part of my life.
Everyone that comes into your life makes a difference in some way. You learn something from each person, guiding you to become a better, more logical person. Even when youâre angry, donât tell someone you wish theyâd never been in your life.
Speaking those words implies that you would be better off without the life lessons you learned. Plus, it indicates that your memories with the person donât matter. You had happy times with the person, so donât speak these negative words you canât take back.
3. You always do this.
This phrase overgeneralizes the other personâs behavior. Also, avoid things like, âyou never do this,â for the same reason. They sometimes do it right even if they keep doing the same thing that makes you angry.
If the other person does try to do things to make you angry, you shouldnât be spending time with them. By overgeneralizing their mistakes, you make them feel bad about themselves. Plus, theyâll think they can never live up to your expectations.
4. I donât think your passions are worthwhile.
Telling someone that the things they are passionate about arenât worthwhile is hurtful and demeaning. When they are excited about something, let them be excited even if you donât understand it. Donât turn your anger into an emotional attack on the other personâs goals, dreams, or visions.
If their passions interfere with your life, point out how it affects you and your relationship. Donât attack their joy over the experience. Instead, only bring up the main issue that you want to discuss.
If you have already expressed your concerns, refrain from saying more. Please donât assume they arenât listening and begin commenting negatively to get their attention. Give them time to process your words, offering a better chance that theyâll see your perspective.
5. We should break up. (This is one of the negative comments you might regret later)
When youâre angry at your partner, avoid using this negative phrase. Even if you feel like you might want to break up in the heat of the moment, give yourself time to reflect on the thought. Chances are if it comes to mind only when youâre angry, you donât honestly want to break up.
If you repeatedly use this comment, your partner might not forgive you. No one wants to worry about their relationship ending, so avoid using it as ammunition. Plus, you might say the words and find that you get your angry wish when they disappear.
6. I donât care what you have to say.
When you use this negative comment, it implies that you think you have better things to do. It makes the other person feel like you donât value your relationship, their opinion, or their place in your life. Avoid making people feel like they donât matter to you even when you’re angry.
Telling someone you donât care makes them feel alone and invisible. It can create an irreparable rift in your relationship, and theyâll stop coming to you for things.
7. I donât ever want to see you again.
Saying that you donât ever want to see someone again is incredibly hurtful. Even if you apologize later, theyâll always wonder if youâd rather they werenât around. Plus, the person will always worry that youâll say hurtful comments in the future.
If you want the people in your life to feel comfortable around you, avoid saying negative things like this. You donât want people feeling on edge when youâre in the room. Try using kind words and walking away when youâre angry.
8. I hate the people in your life.
It becomes a severe personal attack when you say that you hate someoneâs family or friends. Many people take negative comments about their loved ones more seriously than ones about themselves. Relationships are complicated, so avoid bringing up issues with people they care about when youâre angry.
Thereâs a fine line when it comes to insulting someoneâs loved ones and friends. If you keep the negative comments going, you might end up saying something the other person wonât forgive. Plus, if they do forgive you, it can make things tense in social situations.
9. This happened because of what you did.
Placing blame is never the right thing to do when youâre angry. Even if something is the other person’s fault, pointing it out wonât help the situation andâll likely worsen things. Telling someone that itâs all their fault isnât kind, and itâll bring them down while ruining their self-confidence.
If you often place blame when youâre angry, the people in your life will feel like they canât please you. Theyâll feel like you constantly attack their attempts and fixate on their mistakes.
10. Youâll never change.
This negative comment is harmful for a couple of reasons. First, it implies that you donât like the person as they are, making them feel like they arenât good enough. Second, they wonât try to change their behavior because theyâll feel like you wonât recognize it.
No one is perfect, so using this comment implies that they cannot improve. The other person might be trying their most complex, and your comment could knock them right back down. Give them a chance, and kindly point out what they did wrong instead.
11. Forget about it. (You might not think of these words as negative comments, but it stops productive conversation)
While you might think this comment is fine, itâs not. Telling someone to forget about the issue or the conversation isnât helpful because it hides real emotions. Itâll cause the other person to worry and stress more, potentially causing anxiety.
Instead, try to express yourself. If you canât express yourself without saying hurtful things, ask for time to calm down. Asking for time is better than telling them to forget about it because it shows you arenât giving up or dismissing them.
12. You deserve every bad thing thatâs happened to you.
Bad things sometimes happen in life, but it doesnât mean the person deserved it. Some people even spend lots of time and energy trying to figure out what they did to deserve bad things. By telling someone they deserved terrible things, it can make them question who they are.
The person you say it to might start to feel like they arenât worthy of good things. They might start looking down on themselves and passing up on positive experiences and opportunities. Even if you apologize, your words can still affect them.
13. I canât believe how stupid you are.
Telling someone they are stupid knocks their self-esteem and makes them question their abilities. Plus, itâll make them question the way you view them regularly.
When you feel like you might call someone stupid, remind yourself that mistakes happen. Everyone makes mistakes, and it doesnât make them stupid or incompetent. This reminder will help you hold back the angry words and keep the thoughts inside.
Calling someone stupid isnât the only derogatory comment you can make out of anger. Avoid any name-calling because itâs all damaging in some way.
14. Iâve done so much for you, so you owe me.
You shouldnât expect anything in return when you do things for others. Do the favor or offer your help without holding it against the other person. Using this comment or something similar will make the person feel like they should never accept help.
This type of comment will also break the trust in your relationship. The other person will feel betrayed that youâre throwing things in their face. No one owes you anything, so avoid this phrase entirely.
Final Thoughts on Negative Comments Never to Say in Anger
When you experience anger, your emotions might be all over the place. At the moment, you might want to say something to hurt the other person. Remember that doing so will only worsen the situation, cause unnecessary emotional pain, and cause you to regret what you said.
Avoid using these negative words, and youâll find that your arguments become resolved much sooner. No one is perfect, so you might still make mistakes sometimes, but keep working and avoiding this type of negativity.
Sometimes, people donât even realize they are saying hurtful things. If you say any of the negative comments on this list or something similar, you are putting off positivity. Avoid doing this so you donât irreparably damage relationships by hurting others.