Iâve heard of falling in love, but hardly have I come across people who have fallen out of love. Is this even possible? Can your partner suddenly stop loving you? Before we answer that question, you must know that thereâs a huge difference between âlovingâ and âbeing in loveâ.
âFalling out of love is one of those awful parts of life that we donât want to think about until we sense that itâs happening to us. At first, we think weâre imagining things, it’s rare we stop and ask ourselves, “does he love me?” But pretty soon it becomes clear that something is really, really wrong,â says dating coach Elizabeth Stone.
Letting go of someone that you never thought you would have to let go of is a difficult thing. When someone has stopped loving you, it may feel like the world wonât continue spinning. However, we all know that isnât true. Letting go and moving forward with life is entirely possible, and itâs the healthy solution to having to say goodbye to someone you once loved.
When itâs time to let go and say goodbye, we are often left wondering how to go about doing that. After all, itâs not something thatâs taught to us in school. Here are the best ways to let go of someone whoâs stopped loving you, and move forward to a better and healing tomorrow.
Here Are 5 Ways To Help You Emotionally Release Someone Who Stopped Loving You
âNothing in the universe can stop you from letting go and starting over.â â Guy Finley
1. Understand why you broke up
What was it about the relationship that wasn’t working? What caused the rift that had the both of you part ways in the first place? If you canât pinpoint the exact reason, you may want to think about what went wrong in the relationship. This doesnât mean that it was your fault, their fault, or anyoneâs fault.
Sometimes, people donât work out in a relationship. That doesnât mean there must be a good and bad guy in the breakup story. Even if it still hurts, understanding why the relationship ended is the first step to allowing yourself to let them go and learn to say goodbye.
You can stay civil and on speaking terms if necessary–or you can part ways for good. There’s no right or wrong answer, just what is best for your heart.
2. Take your time
You donât need to get over your heartbreak right away. Thereâs a reason that the phrase âtime heals all woundsâ is as popular as it is. While it may not be true in the sense that time heals ALL wounds, taking your time can indeed make healing a lot easier. If you try to push yourself into feeling better and bottle up how youâre feeling, it will only come back ten times harder than before.
âSometimes time shows us that the feelings we felt were only to be felt in passing — as we passed on by and on to the next individual we love. Thatâs why you have to give time a chance. Even if it doesnât do the trick of healing all your wounds, it will most certainly numb the pain. It will turn those vivid memories into blurry renditions,â says entrepreneur Paul Hudson.
When youâre learning to let go, the most important thing to do is to let yourself take all the time you need to heal. One day, youâll wake up and realize that you arenât feeling the same pain as when it first happened.
3. Understand why you need to let them go
Relationships donât always end for good. There are times where a relationship can be rekindled and put back together. However, when youâre saying goodbye to someone who has stopped loving you, itâs best to understand that the relationship will not likely be fixed. Sometimes, we need to understand that relationships end so we can move forward and find that special relationship weâre meant to be in forever.
Understanding why you need to let them go is a great tool in healing âbecause if you donât those emotions will catch up with you, and youâll end up doing something that youâll later regret,â adds Hudson. Once you have that understanding, you will no longer feel the need to be drawn back into a relationship that has reached its expiration date.
4. Meet new people
This doesnât mean that you have to start going on dating apps and meeting people in bars right after youâve said goodbye. Hooking up with people wonât fix that feeling of heartbreak. However, surrounding yourself with new people will aid in your recovery. You wonât fall in love with someone new right away, but if you allow yourself to enjoy new people, you may âfall in loveâ with parts of people, which can help you get the feeling back in your life as it moves forward.
Surrounding yourself with new people will also allow you to fill your days with learning about new people instead of wallowing. Also, be careful with rebounding because âat these early stages of grief, itâs easy to have tunnel vision: You dwell on what was wrong in the relationshipâwhat hurt and wounded you,â says doctor and author Robert Taibbi, L.C.S.W.
So, what does this mean?
Whenever you are ready–you get to decide! Don’t cave into peer pressure. Let your heart heal, then consider relaunching your social life.
5. Open yourself to finding love
When we say goodbye to someone we truly love, it can feel like that was it for us. We met the love of our lives, and it didnât work out, and thereâs no one else for us. But that isnât true! Spiritual matchmaker Heather Kristian Strang says, âIn a spiritual sense, all true love is eternal. Death, breakups, divorce â whatever it may be â cannot destroy a true love.â
Therefore, closing yourself to love can shut you off from finding the person you were meant to be with. Sometimes, relationships end so that we can find the love of our lives. When you meet that person, all of the pain from saying goodbye to your last love will heal like never before. Keeping yourself open to love is going to be the thing that helps you heal and move forward, every time.
Final Thoughts on Moving on When Someone Stops Loving You
Saying goodbye is a difficult task. When we think that the person we were with will be with us forever, figuring out how to let them go isnât easy. However, it can be done, leading us to richer, more fulfilling lives. It can even lead us to meet the love of our lives. Donât be afraid of letting go and healing, even if it hurts for a while.
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