One of the foundations of any relationship is trust and honesty. Unfortunately, many people don’t have an honest partner and are left to decipher if what they are being told is the truth.
If you have a hard time deciding whether or not to believe your partner, then you need a few tips to help you. Here are ten red flags that can reveal that your significant other is telling you a fib.
10 Signs Your Partner is Telling a Fib
Here are ten red flags that reveal a fib.
1. They Won’t Look You in the Eye
The most significant indicator that someone is lying to you is that they won’t look you in the eye. They always say that the eyes are the window to the soul, so you can tell that their soul is not right if they can’t even look at you directly.
Whether it’s a little fib or a big lie, people often avoid eye contact. They will look off to the corner or even look at the ground. If you see them avoiding looking at you head-on, then ask them to look you in the eye and tell you the truth. You might see their house of cards tumble right before you. A liar doesn’t like confrontation.
2. They Sweat as They Fib
For some reason, the body tends to sweat when it’s under duress. Telling a fib is just the type of stress that causes the body to react. Experts believe that cortisol levels rise when someone is facing a fearful situation, and this hormone activates the fight or flight response in the body.
You may see sweat beading upon their forehead, or it may also drop from their hands. Depending on how big the lie, they may drench themselves. It all depends on their level of guilt and how their body reacts to the line they are feeding you. Anyway, if they start sweating when they are telling you a story, then it’s hot, or they are fibbing.
3. They List Character Witnesses
One of the first things that people do when they are caught is that they attempt to get others involved. Your partner may name ten friends that you can call for a witness. These friends probably know nothing about the situation. They are just fillers in the conversation to make their story look more believable.
If you were to ask for the number to one of these friends, then the entire story may change. If your partner tries to lie to you and give you a list of buddies that you can call to verify, then ask for specific information and call their bluff. Watch them sweat when you want telephone numbers and last names. If they eagerly give them to you, then they are probably going to have them cover, or they are not telling a fib after all.
4. They Can’t Sit or Stand Still
If you’ve ever observed a child when they are lying, they are often fidgety. They can’t sit or stand still because they know inside that they are doing wrong. When your partner is telling you a story, you may notice that they have a hard time staying still.
The twitching and moving back and forth is all caused by nervousness and anxiety. They know they are feeding you a line of bull, and the thought of telling you the truth is scary. It could cost your relationship, or you may find that they cheated. They fear what may happen If and when you find out what’s truly going on.
5. They Use Avoidance Techniques
If you ask your partner over and over about something and they refuse to answer, it could be that the truth is too hard for you to handle. Avoidance is an excellent way to tell if someone is lying. They may try to redirect the conversation to other things.
If it’s a text message communication, they could avoid the topic altogether. They may give you a blanket explanation and then never want to talk about it again. If you bring up a question that you feel needs to be discussed, and they shut you down, it’s something that needs to be investigated.
6. The Story Has Holes in It
If you’ve caught your partner before in lies, then it’s likely that you can spot the holes in their story early on. Look for any inconsistencies or things that point to deception. For instance, they may say they were out with a particular friend and then slip another name because they forgot who they told you they were out with that evening.
A fib can have as many holes in it as Swiss cheese, so you must learn to decipher every word they say, especially if they have a long history of being dishonest with you.
7. Their Voice Sounds Strange
When someone is not telling the truth, their heart can race, and the anxiety can make their voice crack or sound different. Have you ever run up a hill and lost your breath? Well, being in a state of angst can make you feel as if you’ve just run in a marathon.
If you notice that your partner is having a hard time getting the story out, their voice is cracking, or they are short of breath, then these are all signs that point to anxiety. It’s time to do some detective work if the conversation makes them this uneasy because they are indeed hiding something.
8. They Turn on the Waterworks
Women tend to use tears more than men, but men are not afraid to cry when they might lose something or someone they love. If your partner overspent on the credit card or cheated on you, then they may turn on the tears to try to get into your good graces.
Men and women alike have learned how to manipulate one another through emotions and body language. Women tend to be able to turn on the tears quicker than most, but they have learned over the years that male counterparts almost always fall for them. If your partner is quick to turn on the waterworks when they are confronted about something, then you might want to tell them to stop the drama because you want the truth.
9. They Have a Panic Attack
You already know that anxiety can play a big part when someone is telling a lie. Lie detector tests measure the breathing and heart rates to determine if someone is dishonest. Thankfully, you can quickly understand without a machine.
Someone who is trying to tell a false story could have a full-blown panic attack. An anxiety attack can have symptoms of the following:
•Impending Doom
•Feeling as if they are going to pass out
•Difficulty breathing
•Choking sensations
•Nausea and vomiting
•Sweating
•Lightheadedness/Dizziness
All these sensations can be signs that they are trying to avoid telling you the truth, or they have fed you one big lie. It’s up to you to decide whether they are telling you the truth or using dramatics to feed you a line.
10. They Volunteer to Take a Lie Detector Test
The lie detector test has always been the hallmark of proving whether a person is lying or telling the truth. If a person feels like they will get caught in a lie, they will often swear on a bible and want to take a lie detector test.
Now, the beauty in this statement is that you can pay and have your partner take this test to prove their innocence or guilt.
The downside to this statement is that your partner knows that you are never going to take the matter this far. They believe that telling you that they are willing to take such a test is enough to prove their honesty.
They have no interest in taking a test to prove that they are telling the truth. Rather, they are using this statement to sway your belief that there’s no way they could be lying if they are willing to go to such extreme measures.
Final Thoughts on How to Use Your Senses to Spot a Fib
Did you know that your senses can make spotting dishonesty easy? First, you can see and observe their behavior. If they are fidgeting or unable to look you in the eye, then their behavior is suspect.
You can use your sense of sound to hear a cracking voice or one that is out of breath. You may also be able to identify inaccuracies in their story.
If something sounds fishy to you, then it probably is a lie. Your sense of touch may be able to pick up on cold, clammy hands and other feelings that are associated with sweating caused by anxiety. If their honesty isn’t in question, then they wouldn’t be having signs of an inward struggle outwards.
Lastly, your sense of smell can come into play. If you smell a rat, then chances are you are being fed a big line of deceit. Both men and women have an intuition that can help them in these situations. If your partner is telling you a fib, then you need to call them out on it.
Don’t accept the garbage they are trying to feed you, especially if this is not the first time. You will find plenty of fish in the sea, and many of them will be more than happy to tell you the truth. Do you want to be with someone dishonest anyway?
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