Do you find humility an attractive trait in others? It’s no wonder–psychology explains that humans have this respect for (and attraction to) humble people in our very psyche.
Psychologists have an important job as they comb through the cobwebs of the mind. They don’t require safety glasses, hardhats, or steel-toed boots, but their position is just as dangerous. They may not explore the ocean floor or rappel in caves, but digging through the archives of the brain can be just as unsafe.
While these professionals may not be Indiana Jones looking for buried treasure, they do look at the habits of the current and past civilizations. The Current Directions in Psychological Science posted a study conducted where experts examined both the limitations and abilities of man. They wanted to explore people who were humble rather than self-focused.
Humility has become a significant subject matter, and folks have many questions about the past that help them relate to the present. People often use the word humble as a verb rather than an adjective. It’s a word that we throw around both the social and personality aspects of psychology.
A person who wants to build positive psychology and have a complete comprehension of forgiveness, pride, and contentment, must learn the art of being unpretentious. It’s a personality trait that has nothing to do with your IQ, but it’s linked to your open-mindedness and your reflection on matters.
The Beauty of Humility
Did you know that people who have a respectful nature are usually less aggressive and aren’t typically judgmental? Humbleness can help you understand people of other religions and walks of life, yet it doesn’t disrupt your convictions.
Consider borderline or narcissistic personality disorders. These people are self-centered and focused on their needs more than the needs of others. Can humility be taught, and can it make a difference in the way people are treated with mental illness?
Perhaps even more shocking is that people with humbleness are more attractive to potential suitors. What is it about someone who is reverent that makes them so desirable? Here are some reasons why psychologists think this attraction occurs.
Six Reasons Why Human Beings Are Attracted to the Trait of Humility in Others
1. They Can Admit When They’re Wrong
Do you know someone that wouldn’t admit they were wrong even if they were? They have such arrogance and pride about them that they would do anything to avoid acknowledging an error. Consider the old saying about eating humble pie.
The saying came from the 1300s when a pie made of wild animals’ internal organs, and it was given to the servants to eat. The lowest people on the totem pole were given these scraps as nourishment. When someone would acknowledge their wrong, they were said to have to eat this pie.
The beauty of this saying has nothing to do with the pie itself, but it’s the metaphorical connotations behind it. Admitting you’re wrong is refreshing in a world where everyone wants to be right, and it seems that even your ancestors were stubborn too.
To a person looking for a friend or mate, the ability to admit mistakes and not blame others for their blunders is refreshing and downright attractive. It means they understand that life isn’t always about who’s right and who’s wrong.
2. They Believe Everything Can Improve
Life gives us lessons, and some of them are difficult to learn. You may say that when you reach rock bottom, you truly learn the nature of humility. Everyone desires to be something in life, and most feel they are destined for greatness. Have you ever heard the saying that pride comes before a fall?
Some folks get a little bit cocky about their abilities and status in life, which is a wrong move. Attitudes like that may leave you homeless and without a job. Sadly, it can also alienate those around you. While these ideations are commonly from young adults getting acclimated to the world, they will eventually learn.
Humility will kill every ounce of pride you have. You will learn how little you really know, and then you will become more teachable. Your character improves when you spend time at rock bottom. This time at the bottom helps you to be honest with yourself and those around you that you need help.
To others, admitting that you don’t know it all and being understanding of folks experiencing their rock bottom is attractive.
3. They Don’t Take People or Things for Granted
Many people think that attraction is all about physical traits. However, it must go beyond the physical to reach a deeper level. Those who have humility are often grateful.
What could be more attractive than someone thankful for everything? As you walk through life, you must remember that nothing is permanent. Everything you have comes with a price, and you are not entitled to anything. It takes humility and wisdom to have gratitude.
You must lose things of value to know their true worth. You will watch the money come and go as well as friends. That’s why a person who has learned these life lessons will become thankful for all they have. When you are grateful, things don’t lose their value.
How often have you wanted to tell a friend or loved one how much they mean to you, but you never told them? As you morn at their grave, you remember all the opportunities to show them your gratitude that you missed.
Many people beat themselves up because they didn’t take time to be grateful for the blessings they have in life. No wonder people find it attractive when others have a heart of thanksgiving.
4. They Treat People the Way They Want to Be Treated
Dr. Martin Luther King asked the important question about what are you doing to help others? It’s hard to put other people’s needs in front of yours, but humbleness and humanity demand it.
When you are humble in life, you can see the value of others more than yourself. It helps you to build trust and a firm foundation to live peacefully. Did you know that how you treat people will influence how they treat other folks?
It’s a beautiful thing to understand that each time you treat a person with the love and respect they deserve, they will pass it along to others. It’s one way that society can re-create the world to be a better place.
5. They Know That It’s the Solid Foundation of All Virtues
It’s not easy to be honest about yourself or the environment you live in. However, when you open your eyes and look at things as they are, you will see room for improvement. Plus, you will see all the opportunities that are in front of you.
Taking a good look in the mirror will allow you to examine the parts that need to be fixed. What part of your character needs work? Perhaps, you need to learn to be more compassionate, or you need to develop some patience.
There’s no way that you have mastered life. Even in your job, there are things that you can do differently to make your work quality increase. What can you do to enhance your day and make it better?
When you go through life with the mindset that you’re not perfect and have much work to do, it keeps you meek and respectable. Some people would say that it’s attractive to see your flaws and desire to fix them.
6. They Know Humility Is the Best Tool to Become Successful
There are many things that humility will show you. First, it shows you that your way is not always the best. Other methods may be a better way to succeed, and it creates confidence.
When you are honest with yourself, then it opens the door for growth and improvement. Having a confident nature will take you far, but having a meek and teachable one will take you to infinity and beyond. Lastly, it will help you to gain the influence of others.
How many times do you go to the cocky or arrogant person for advice? When you have a modest nature, it will cause others to trust you. They will value your words and opinions because you’re unassuming and real.
When you’re willing to share stories about your times at rock bottom to help others, you become the voice of authority.
Final Thoughts on Why People Find Humility Attractive
As psychologists continue to delve into the areas of the mind and understand humbleness, they are more fascinated by what they learn. Having a heart of thanksgiving, practicing the Golden Rule, and examining the inadequacies of your life makes you unpretentious.
People are drawn to those who are real. They don’t want someone who acts like they have it all together and are secretly a mess inside. They want to hear from those who aren’t afraid to talk about their experiences at rock-bottom because they are relatable.
Do you show humility in your daily life? It’s an interesting concept to consider.
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