When we need advice, sometimes we do not consider asking our quietest loved ones. But most of us know one introvert that is a steady, stable force in our lives. They are someone who might not say a lot of words. But their actions show their care and consideration. On the other hand, some of us are quiet people in the lives of others.
Anyone needs exposure to introverts, extroverts, and ambiverts in their social circles. However, it can be helpful to know who to turn to when looking to take your mind off things, go on an adventure, and especially when looking for good advice.
It is common for quiet people to find others turning to them for advice. This is because introverts are typically conscientious and considerate listeners, which leads them to possess several good qualities that impact their advice-giving prowess. But what traits make it seem like quiet people always know what to say when offering their input? Read on to discover why your quiet friends might be the best people to turn to for advice.
Why Quiet People Usually Give the Best Advice
1. They Are Good Listeners
The most obvious reason quiet people are great to turn to in times of guidance is that they tend to be great listeners. Sometimes when people are louder, they are too busy talking and thinking of the next thing they want to say that they forget to sit back and listen to what you are saying. So, it can be hard to find friends you can turn to when you need their support the most.
Usually, quiet people have no problem devoting their full attention to you and letting you speak for as long as you need. When looking for advice, this is important for two reasons. The first reason is that you want the person advising you to know the whole story and your feelings about the situation. Sometimes loud people will jump to advise before they have heard the entire story.
The second reason is that sometimes you might not be looking for strict advice; instead, you want to vent to a friend and hear their opinion. Quiet people are good at engaging in passivism which can make it ideal if you want to vent to someone. However, it is always a good idea to ask your friend if they are willing to lend an ear to your venting to make sure they are up for it.
Research shows that introverts are known for being great listeners and better at one-on-one socialization than in group settings. Because of this, approaching an introvert for advice will likely make them feel like they can open up and be genuine with you. While some extroverts may feel uncomfortable in an intimate setting, it is where introverts excel.
2. Quiet People Are Usually Deep Thinkers
Another great reason to turn to a quiet person when you need advice is that they are known to be deep thinkers. When a friend takes time to ponder the information you are giving them, you receive more in-depth advice. Because they tend to think deeply, they give advice that reflects their wisdom.
This is not to say that loud people don’t think deeply. Instead, quiet people are more adept at thinking deeply when around others. Because they are focused on their inner world, most introverts have developed a keen ability to focus even if they are confronted with surprising information or are concentrating in a disruptive environment.
They might feel comfortable taking a few minutes in your conversation to think things out or even talk them out with you. They can consider all sides of the conversation you are having with them and all the possible scenarios their advice might lead you to and narrow that information down to brief and direct pieces of advice.
Engaging in deep conversation is not always desired, but when it comes to seeking advice, it can be very helpful. Deep thinking can lead you to question things about the subject you are getting advice on that you have never thought about before. It can also open you up to seeing the situation in a different light.
3. They Can Provide Quality Over Quantity
Expert Jill Chang writes about how introverted and quiet people often focus on quality over quantity in their work and personal lives. While an extroverted person may offer an overview of the different actions you could take or the possible scenarios for the future, quiet people tend to focus on breaking things down into the most valuable tidbits of advice.
There are many reasons why quality is more important than quantity when giving advice. Firstly, it can be hard to examine when one is given a large amount of advice at once. It might even feel overwhelming to wade through all the advice and determine how it can help you take action. However, if one is given a single thorough and well-contemplated piece of advice, it gives them something to focus on when making their own decision.
For example, let’s say you are looking for advice on accepting a job offer. A quiet person might listen as you explain the pros and cons of the move. They might consider your career goals combined with who you are as a person and then offer their own opinion on whether you should take the job and why they think so. On the other hand, a louder person might give you several pieces of advice that make the decision-making process more convoluted than it needs to be.
4. More Direct Advice
Numerous studies have proven that introverts give more direct advice than extroverts. This is helpful because direct advice helps avoid several problems from occurring. When indirect advice is given, it is easy for miscommunication to happen. In addition, direct communication is more concise and easier to follow.
Sometimes indirect advice can be useful, particularly if the situation you are dealing with is not black and white. However, direct advice tends to be more helpful in the long run when you’re looking for solid guidance. For example, if you are asking for advice on how to deal with attending a social gathering or not, a quiet person might suggest that you stay home because you are not feeling well. On the other hand, a more extroverted person might tell you that if you feel like it, you might want to consider going and seeing how you feel when you get there.
Both pieces of advice have moments where they could be accommodating. However, direct advice is more valuable when looking for advice that helps you make concise decisions. Direct advice is also constructive in situations where you already know the answer to the problem you are dealing with and want someone to reassure you. In some ways, this is a kind of permission or affirmation to make the wisest decision that is the most appropriate for your circumstances.
5. They Consider The Consequences Of The Advice They Give
Another reason to turn to quiet people when you need advice is that they might have more foresight than louder people. Quiet people are known for deep contemplation and considering the consequences of their actions. In most cases, this skill translates to when they are advising others.
Quiet people are usually very proactive. They think before they speak and act. Sometimes extroverts jump into situations without giving them the proper amount of consideration. It is also important to note that quiet people are not necessarily more logical than louder people. Sometimes the advice they give is more intuitive. In general, they can assess situations and determine what form of advice is most beneficial.
While an extrovert might give advice based on what will feel the best in the short-term, quiet people are versed in a holistic approach to advice-giving. Often they will consider how their advice might impact your emotions, well-being, and actions in the future. This is crucial because if a friend offers advice with long-term outcomes in mind. That’s because it avoids the possibility that selfish motives fuel their advice.
6. They Are More Focused On Working Together
Introverts tend to lean towards collaboration more often than extroverts. One study shows that extroverts encounter more conflicts when working together, while quiet people gravitate towards collaboration. This is important to consider in terms of advice-giving as it is essential for the person advising to be open to your input.
Often, we think of advice as getting help or assistance from an outside person. However, advice frequently involves collaboration. For example, if the advice you’re looking for is focused on finding a solution to a problem, collaboration can make it easier to find a suitable solution. Rather than your friend telling you what to do and how to do it, quiet people prefer talking it out and considering the issue from multiple angles.
Collaboration leads to helpful advice being given and creates stronger friendships. Quiet individuals tend to be very intuitive and observant, which can give them a better understanding of you. Because of this, they are more adept at giving advice catered to your unique situation, personality, and life experience. Sitting down with an introvert and seeking their advice can be a rewarding and bonding experience.
Final Thoughts On Some Reasons Why Quiet People Give The Best Advice
When you are wondering who to turn to when needing quality advice, try to think of the quiet people in your life. Often quiet people are pushed to the sidelines of our minds. However, being aware of their strong suits can make us better people and cause beautiful friendships to bloom. Giving and taking advice requires being vulnerable, thoughtful, and considerate. It is the quietest people with the most precious advice.
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