As you may have noticed by now, not everyone is a delight to be around. This doesnât make them a bad person necessarily; it just means that they donât necessarily serve as a healthy influence. Let’s call it, perhaps, toxic.
Even stating that someone is toxic can be a bit harsh. However, if a person displays behavior that has a negative impact on us in any way, it is unhealthy (toxic) for us. Quite frankly, we shouldnât have to subject ourselves to someone elseâs toxicity. Despite our tendency to want to give someone the benefit of the doubt, we donât need to do so. Especially if we are using all of our energy to maintain the relationship. So, what are the signs of a toxic person? Weâve come up with 11âŚ
Sign #1: Theyâre bad listeners
Something to address quickly: itâs normal to want to think of something to say while someone else is talking. After all, nobody likes sounding âunsureâ or âdumbâ.
Two things: (1) trying to think of something to say when another person is speaking is not effective (2) this is not what makes somebody a bad listener.
A lack of acknowledgment, lack of response, and just plain disinterest are what make someone a bad listener. Many times, theyâll just continue talking about themselves anyway.
Sign #2: Theyâre always the victim
To them, any adverse situation is the result of someone elseâs actions. Have a breakup? Itâs always their evil partner. Came in late to work? Well, itâs the traffic (always (despite nobody else seeing it). Flop on the exam? Well, the questions didnât match the study guide!
It doesnât matter if they are at fault â theyâll never admit it. These people have usually gotten so good at making up excuses that theyâre uttered semiconsciously.
Sign #3: Toxic people judge others unfairly
Ever been somewhere and heard a toxic person make a rude comment about someone in the room that theyâve never even met? Itâs weird and shocking at the same time â weird because itâs so out of nowhere and shocking because 99% of people donât do that.
But some toxic people will say they have the magical ability to innately âfeelâ when something is wrong with someone else. Worse yet is when they make a crack on someone elseâs physical appearance.
Sign #4: Theyâre attention seekers
Then we have this group â the ones always needing attention. The easiest way to detect this is in a conversation: theyâre always interrupting, dominating, and controlling.
The only time theyâre happy in a conversation is when they are turning it back onto themselves. Theyâre also the ones who always seem to always find themselves in the middle of the group picture while simultaneously being the loudest one anywhere.
Sign #5: Toxic people are disrespectful of everyone
Itâs still shocking to people watch and witness how some folks act. People still litter, graffiti property, cut people off in traffic, donât say thank you, etc. These misguided, socially wretched behaviors are very disturbing.
(Does anybody else ever wonder who raised these people?)
Sign #6: Theyâre constantly interrupting
Interrupting conversations, interrupting traffic, interrupting with their phone; these folks are constantly in âme modeâ and to heck with anyone else that tries to get in their way. Theyâve got better things to do than display some empathy or patience.
In seriousness, this is really annoying. Itâs human nature to interject someone and apologize. Itâs downright rude to be so self-centered and clueless.
Sign #7: Toxic people inflate their own ego
Quick question: how do most people come to the conclusion that someone is exceptional (as a person or at something)? Well, we simply observe and come to a conclusion.
Michael Jordan never had to tell us he was a great basketball player. Mother Theresa never had to tell us she was a loving, kind person.
So, when we hear someone talk about how theyâre great without being asked and without merit, itâs (again) weird and shocking. Most people are modest about their qualities, but toxic people are not âmost people.â
Sign #8: Theyâre physically or emotionally abusive
This goes without saying, but physically and/or emotionally abusing another person or animal is an unconscionable and toxic act. Nothing else really needs to be said on the subject, except that if weâre being abused or know of another person or animal being abused that it should be reported to authorities immediately.
Sign #9: They canât admit that theyâre wrong
In other words, they always have to be right. No amount of evidence to the contrary can sway a toxic personâs illogical conclusion that they are right.
Some people will go to the extreme of a loud, vocal argument to âproveâ theyâre right. Mind you, there is nothing of substance that is being said â theyâre trying to âwinâ the debate on noise level alone.
Bottom line: not being able to admit that theyâre wrong and not being able to admit when someone is right are undesirable characteristics in a person.
Sign #10: They donât take any responsibility
A close cousin of #2 and #10, some people donât take responsibility for anything. Unfortunately, these people canât see that their own actions yielded an undesirable result.
As for examples, we see this when someone is arguing with an authority figure â a cop, teacher, judge, etc. â and illogically pleading a case without actually having a case. For rational folks, we see this as a childish attempt to deflect responsibility from where it belongs.
Sign #11: Theyâre still âcliquishâ
Ever seen the movie Clueless with Alicia Silverstone? If so, itâs quickly apparent that Cher (Silverstoneâs character) and their group look down on pretty much everyone. Everyone else is dirty, badly dressed, or otherwise unworthy of their recognition.
There are still people who act âas ifâ (get it?) itâs still high school. If someone else isnât driving the newest car, flashing the latest threads or populating the same neighborhood, theyâre simply not worth the time. Toxic people consider themselves in another class that only a few, if anyone at all, deserve admittance.
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.